Are you an arrogant leader? Or a humble leader? Are you sure?
During a recent executive retreat I facilitated, one CEO approached me, asking what the difference is between arrogance and humility. Great question! I asked him why he was interested in this, and he sheepishly admitted that he had been accused of arrogance in a recent employee survey, and he thought he was” just being confident.” One of the survey respondents actually wrote: “This boss does not know the meaning of the word ‘humility.’” I indicated that I would ponder it a bit. Later, I thought this so important, that I asked the group to think about the leaders in their past, and to put together their thoughts about the question, and this is what they came up with:
Arrogant leaders have a difficult time admitting they are wrong. Humble leaders are self-confident enough to do so, and to apologize for their mistakes.
Arrogant leaders talk more than they listen, and talk over you, assuming that they know what you are going to say. Humble leaders are patient, listen to what you say, and never try to read your mind before you say what is needed.
Arrogant leaders embellish their contribution to the work, often taking credit for things done by others. Humble leaders share the credit freely and willingly.
Arrogant leaders make demands…”Get it done!” Humble leaders ask “How can I help you?”
Arrogant leaders focus on position and status to get decisions made (I’m in charge, you’re not!). Humble leaders work with their staff to find the best solution, and see the perspectives of their staff as important information.
Arrogant leaders expect that the people around them must prove themselves to be respected. Humble leaders offer respect unconditionally.
Arrogant leaders have difficulty receiving feedback from others about their performance. Humble leaders accept all feedback as a rich opportunity to learn and grow.
Arrogant leaders discount those who disagree with them as either disloyal or even as opponents. Humble leaders see disagreement as an opportunity to learn and share perspectives.
Arrogant leaders make it clear that your development and growth are your responsibilities. Humble leaders work to support and inspire growth, and take the time to teach others the best of what they know.
Arrogant leaders put their own agendas first, even before the goals of the organization. Humble leaders focus on the organizational goals, and the common good of the customer and the people doing the daily work.
Clearly, they recognized that humility is a strength, not a weakness, and that arrogance is a problem.
So, what are your thoughts? What would you add to the list?